Communicating with Neighbors
Texting, notes, or doorbell? How to communicate with neighbors when you'd rather not have to at all.
Communication methods
Texting or SMS
Advantage:
You can respond at your own pace. No surprises, no facial expressions to read.
Drawback:
Some neighbors find it impersonal.
A note
Advantage:
No direct interaction at all. Good for one-time notifications.
Drawback:
Can come across as formal or distant.
Quick doorbell chat
Advantage:
Personal, quick, and some things need to be handled face-to-face.
Drawback:
Unpredictable — you don't know how long it will last or how the conversation will go.
Tips
- Choose the communication method that costs the least energy — even if that's 'less normal'
- If you need to discuss something, write down beforehand what you want to say
- It's okay to keep a doorbell conversation brief: 'I just wanted to let you know that...'
- Neighborhood WhatsApp groups: mute the group and check at your own pace
Difficult conversations
You want to discuss noise disturbance
Write a short, friendly message. Be specific and suggest a solution. Avoid accusations.
Your neighbor is upset about something you did
Listen, even if it's uncomfortable. Ask if you can respond in writing so you can process it.