Work: dealing with vague expectations
"Can you have a look at this?"
"This should probably be done this week."
"Use your own judgment."
For some people, these are normal work phrases. For others, they're open endings that keep echoing — long after the conversation is over. This article is about how to make that vagueness smaller, without coming across as blunt or defensive.
Many people with masked autism are good at their work. That's exactly why they often get vague assignments. There's an implicit trust in their responsibility, overview, and dedication.
The problem isn't that you can't do the work. The problem is that uncertainty is cognitively expensive. You keep thinking about what's expected, what's "good enough," and whether you're missing something.
That costs energy — often more than the work itself.
Why vague expectations can be so heavy
Vague assignments mean your brain has to fill in the gaps itself. That requires continuous adjusting:
- What exactly is the intention?
- When is this "done"?
- How important is this compared to other tasks?
- What happens if I approach it differently than expected?
If you also want to tune in socially, prevent mistakes, and come across as professional, your system is essentially permanently "on."
Asking for clarity is not a sign of insecurity or incompetence.
It's a way to deliver quality without burning yourself out.
What often goes wrong
Many people try to resolve vagueness internally. You think: I'll figure it out myself. I won't ask difficult questions. I'll just deliver something good.
That often leads to one of these situations:
- you do much more than was needed
- you keep doubting if it's good enough
- you adjust endlessly "just to be sure"
- or: it turns out not to be what they meant
That feels extra frustrating because you did work hard.
What usually works better
It helps to not make vagueness bigger, but smaller. Not by dissecting everything, but by making one or two things explicit.
You don't have to frame it as "I don't understand," but as alignment.
Concrete phrases that often work well
- "Do you want me to approach this broadly or in detail?"
- "Is this meant as a first version or almost final?"
- "What has priority now: this or X?"
- "When do you need to see something at the latest?"
- "When is this good enough for you?"
- "What will you ultimately use this for?"
A small strategy that often brings a lot of peace
You can also choose one short check-in, without opening a discussion:
"I'm approaching this as: A → B → C. If that works, I'll continue."
This gives the other person a chance to adjust — without you having to guess.
In closing
Vague expectations aren't your fault, but they often do land on you. Especially if you're reliable and engaged.
Asking for clarity isn't weakness. It's a way to deliver good work without your mind having to stay on all the time.