Boundaries at work
Saying no is hard, especially when you're used to adapting. But setting boundaries is essential to sustaining yourself at work.
Why boundaries matter
- Without boundaries you'll burn out, even if you don't notice right away
- Other people don't automatically see where your limit is
- Setting boundaries isn't selfishness, it's self-preservation
- It prevents frustration building up and eventually a bigger breakdown
Examples
Colleague asks if you can 'quickly' do something
"I'm in the middle of something right now. Can I look at it after lunch?"
Invitation for Friday afternoon drinks
"I'll skip this one, but thanks for the invite."
Extra tasks on top of your workload
"I can take this on if we agree on what I drop. What takes priority?"
Someone calls without an appointment
"I'm in the middle of something. Could you send me an email and I'll schedule a time?"
Workday running late
"I'm stopping at 5. If it's urgent, I'll pick it up first thing tomorrow morning."
How to practice
1
Start small
- • Practice with low-stakes boundaries (e.g., taking a break)
- • Pick one boundary to practice this week
- • It gets easier with time
2
Make it concrete
- • Use 'I' statements: "I need..."
- • Offer an alternative: "Not now, but..."
- • Be specific about what you can and can't do
3
Dealing with pushback
- • You don't have to defend or explain your boundary
- • Calmly repeat your boundary if someone pushes
- • A 'no' doesn't have to be unkind
- • Remember: someone who doesn't respect your boundaries is the problem — not you